‘It feels irresponsible to have a second child and yet I want one. How do I grapple with this?’


The time you most need a child’s input into what they want, they’re not here to ask, writes advice columnist Eleanor Gordon Smith. Life is uncertain – the question is whether it’s worth living anyway

When I was pregnant with my son in 2018 I felt so worried about what his life would look like. I also felt guilty and selfish. What right did I have to bring new life into a dying world? My family thought I was being melodramatic and, while I do think they were right to a certain extent, I can’t help but worry. Every too-hot summer, every dead bee – and then to the macro scale – bushfires, floods, this pandemic.

And yet I desperately want a second child. I feel it would be grossly irresponsible to have another baby. What kind of life would they have? But then, as we have one already, I feel I have already made that choice and am living with it. I wonder how many other people are grappling with this?

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